Clara Oswald appreciation post.

"I don't know where I am. It's like I'm breaking into a million different pieces and there's only one thing I remember: I have to save the Doctor. He always looks different. Sometimes, I think I'm everywhere at once, running every second, just to save him, but he never hears me. Almost never. I was blown into this world on a leaf, and I'm still blowing. I don't think I'll ever learn. I'm Clara Oswald. I'm the Impossible Girl. I was born to save The Doctor."

So when we first meet Clara, she's not Clara. She's Oswin, the girl in a shipwreck on the planet of the Daleks. No, she's a Dalek. She's a genius, and she's been converted to a Dalek, and she doesn't know it. She's been locked in an asylum because she couldn't handle the truth. But she saves the Doctor, and she dies. Then, we see her again, and she's Clara from Victorian London. She's a barmaid and she's a nanny. But she meets the Doctor, and she saves him. She dies helping him again.

And then we meet Clara Clara! We travel with Clara for most of a season, and we get to know how she's kind and she's brave and she's feisty and she's smart. But we also have no idea how she's Clara from present-day London and she's Clara from the Dalek asylum and she's Clara from the Victorian age. She's the Impossible Girl.

But here's the thing: she's just a normal girl. She's not River or Amy or Rory, she's not important in all sorts of weird ways. She's a normal girl who did something extraordinary, and she's only a mystery because first things first, but not necessarily in that order. We get to the season finale and it all makes sense! The Great Intelligence goes inside the Doctor's time stream to destroy every victory he ever had. He does it for revenge. And then Clara, she picks up on it: this is why she's all of these people.

And she doesn't even cry. She doesn't even blink. She tells him to remember her, and she smiles and she sacrifices her whole being to save the Doctor. Even when River tells her she will die, that everyone else will just be hallow copies of her, her response is, "but they're real enough to save the Doctor, right?" 

It's 8:30 in the morning, I am tired, and I just watched a bunch of Clara episodes, but let me tell you this: if you don't love Clara Oswald, you're wrong,

Whoops a fandom survey.

And it's probably going to be entirely Doctor Who and Supernatural.
Just because. :)

Your current OTP
Doctor/Rose and Amy/Rory. No one will ever change my mind. I don't really have any ships on Supernatural because no one ever stays long enough on the show.

A pairing you initially didn’t consider but you changed your mind.
Initially, I was a huge Eleven/Amy shipper. I hated Rory because how dare he step in on the Doctor and Amy. Now, however, I love Amy/Rory almost as much as Ten/Rose. They're beautiful. I mean just look at this:


A pairing you have never liked and probably never will.
Wincest! I will never understand how people out there want Sam and Dean to have sex. They're brothers, okay? I think their relationship as a family is wonderful, and I love how much they care about each other, but they are my literal broTP. I will never ship them together.

A pairing you wish you liked but just can’t.
I wish I liked Eleven/River, but I just can't bring myself to like her at all. I think I'd enjoy a lot of Eleven's episodes more if I liked her or their ship.

What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom.
The Harry Potter fandom! I've been a part of this fandom for seven years. Always.

Do you remember your first OTP, if so, who was in it?
My first OTP was Ron/Hermione. I really liked Lupin/Tonks too, but Ron/Hermione was the first real couple I ever obsessed over.

Do you prefer characters from real action series or anime series?
I wish I liked anime, but I just can't.

Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms?
Tumblr hasn't really stopped me from liking any fandoms, but the Doctor Who fandom is crawling with nasty people who yell at each other for things that don't matter and it makes me hate some of them.

Name a fandom you didn’t care/think about until you saw it all over tumblr?
The Supernatural fandom! I thought Supernatural sounded stupid, but it kept popping up on my dash so I decided to give it a shot.

How do you feel about the other people in your current fandom?
In Doctor Who, I think that some of them are brilliant. There's this one girl I follow who makes Pipersmith AU gifsets and they're beautiful, and then people post funny shit all the time. But there are tons of weird wars within it. Classic Who vs. NuWho, RTD vs. Moffat, etc.

Your favorite fan artist/author/gif maker gives you one request, what do you ask for?
I actually have an answer to this. I am ashamed of myself, hahaha. Doomslock is my favorite one on tumblr because she makes Pipersmith AUs, where Rose Tyler is the Doctor and Eleven is her companion. I never woulad have thought I'd like that, but I love it. I'd ask for a gifset based around one of the Christmas specials.

Your favorite fanfiction or fanauthor?
I actually don't read fanfiction anymore, so I don't have one.

Choose a song at random, which OTP does it remind you of:
iTunes chose "Come What May" by the Scene Aesthetic. I guess we can go with... Amy/Rory? I don't know.


Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)
AU in which Amy is the Doctor and Rory is her companion.
Why the fuck is this not a thing
I hope it's a thing

A ship you’ve abandoned and why


A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships
I don't know. :( I think all of my ships are common.
I SHIPPED SAM/RUBY THOUGH UNTIL SHE ENDED UP BEING EVIL. :C


Show us an example of your personal headcanon

 If you mostly have homoships, do you have any heteroships
-

If you mostly have heteroships, do you have any homoships
Destiel okay? I can't help it. It's real. I didn't believe everyone when they said it was canon, but it's so ridiculously canon.
  

Are you one of those fans who can’t watch anything without shipping
Um basically yes. I need my ships. I'm a sailor.

5 favorite characters from 5 different fandoms
Doctor Who - Rory Williams
Sherlock - John Watson
Supernatural - Dean Wincheste
Harry Potter - Severus Snape
New Girl - Schmidt

3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms
Doctor Who - Doctor/Rose
Harry Potter - Ron/Hermione
New Girl - Nick/Jess

A fandom you’re in but have no ships from
Sherlock! I don't really want anyone to be together in Sherlock.

Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go
can we just talk about how all of the Doctors are going to be in the 50th anniversary
I am legitimately more excited than words can express. If Nine and Ten come back, what if Rose comes back? What if Amy and Rory make an appearance? OR DONNA. And I get to experience classic and new Who at the same time! I cant even begin to tell you how much this occupies my thoughts. It's ridiculous. BUT IT BETTER BE PERFECT. I'm counting on you Moffat!

I talk too much. Especially about you.

I return to school tomorrow, and it genuinely pains me to think about it. I wish I were as motivated as I used to be. I have to start fresh tomorrow. I know I always say that and seldom does it happen that way, but I've got no choice.

I spent New Year's Eve with Isaias, and I am in the mood to discuss it now. We watched Dr. Who and Scrubs and spent a lot of time ignoring Dr. Who and Scrubs. The only reason we knew it was midnight was because both of our phones vibrated. We had better things to do.

While we were sitting on my couch, he talked a little about college. I already knew a general description of why he never finished - a money issue - but really nothing else. I always wanted to ask, but I never wanted him to feel like I was trying to send him an underlying message, to persuade him to go back or anything.

So I asked, "What do you want to do with your life?" He said culinary school, maybe, but I'm not sure he knows really. And that's okay.

Later, I asked, "Does it bother you that you didn't finish college?"

He said, "All the time."

At that moment, that strangely light-hearted but vulnerable moment, I realized that there might be other things he really dislikes about himself. And if that's true, it breaks my heart.

I still think he's brilliant. It never bothered me because it changed absolutely nothing about him in my mind. Obviously I am biased, but I could not imagine anything better than this adorable person who finds actual enjoyment in Pokemon cards and speaks entirely in ridiculous puns. There is nothing more I could ask for, and a college degree or lack thereof is not going to change that.

I wonder, if I ever give him this blog, if he would think how much I have to say about him is creepy. I hope not. Truly, I'm not in love with him. I'm not obsessed with him. I am just in awe of him, but not in an unhealthy way.

I play it off with a laugh a lot of the time, but truly, I have very little confidence in myself. I see the best in other people but the worst in me. I go through periods of time where I despise myself, and I have had the worst luck with men that I could ever imagine. From Cameron, who told me I was worthless on a regular basis, to Joe, who gave me a year of empty excuses and a wounded psyche, I can't help but feel sometimes like I deserved all the terrible things that those people did to me. I have a hard time grasping the fact that I am with someone like Isaias.

I am having a hard time wrapping myself around the idea that I could deserve someone like Isaias. I hope as he gets to know me better, he will not think the same way I do about myself. I hope that I'm the one with the distorted perspective.

He said to me on my couch last night, "You're wonderful, fantastic even." I'll let those words sit, let them echo through the corridors of my sleep-deprived mind for a while. Lord knows I need the comfort.

If 2013 gives me anything, anything at all in this year of inevitable shifts and breaks in my foundation, let Isaias be a constant.

Nine Ten Eleven.

Instead of doing homework, I have spent all of the time I have been off work looking at AU TenToo/Rose gifsets where they're married and happy together. I genuinely think that Doctor Who has ruined me forever.

I think about Rose and the Doctor probably more than Billie Piper and David Tennant thought about Rose and the Doctor. I was overwhelmed with the love the two had for each other and shattered by the heartbreak that came with it. No show has ever done that before.

I sighed in disappointment with Martha as she fell victim to an unrequited romance but smiled proudly as she saved the world. I rolled my eyes and laughed as season four became Donna and her space man, and I felt the pain she would have had she remembered it all. And with Amy and Rory, I fell in love with them as they fell in love with each other.

And that is why Doctor Who is my favorite show. Yes, an alien travels through time and space but my god this show is about love and bravery, tragedy and heartache, friendship and sacrifice. Second chances and forgiveness. Wrath and power.

I seriously don't even know what I contemplated before this show.

Isaias is watching Doctor Who.

Every time something important happens, he texts me to tell me. Tonight, I get a text from him that just says, "K-9!"

Every time he texts me referencing Doctor Who I just want to kiss him. He never had any desire to watch it before.

In his own words, "the best way to a girl's heart is through her instant queue." He is seriously the cutest fucking person, oh my god.

I can't even be deep about it, which is really surprising at four thirty. I just want to kiss him senseless when I see him tomorrow because everything he ever says makes me laugh or smile.